The First: Table Manners

As I was watching my baby daughter I decided that her motor skills might as well be challenged since they seem to be getting along pretty fine now. So I started to teach her how to use a fork. To keep things simple, we started with finely chopped sausages. At first I tried to teach her the correct, adult way to hold her little plastic fork, and she was cooperating but we ended up falling into the simpler, toddler way of holding the fork. She did really good, I’m so proud! Ho ho, I might be getting worked up about this little thing, but just this morning she used her fingers to eat everything.

For lunch I gave her an apple and went on my own business while she walked around the house eating it. But when I checked on her, the apple was gone. I asked her for it and she did know I was talking about the “apo” as she calls it, but I’m not sure she understood the word “where” when I asked her for it. I convinced her to help me find it: she followed me around the house while I looked for it. I just had to find the apple before I forgot about it. Until it started to rot under, I dunno, the couch. But it just refused to be found! It literally had me on my knees, trying all the places Belle Fille could reach. At that level, I looked for the fruit under the Christmas tree but it wasn’t there.

At least, it wasn’t under the tree. I think Bell Fille wanted to decorate the Christmas tree on her own, so she put the apple there, right in the middle of the lights and spheres. Can you believe it?

Probably not because I just came up with it

Have you ever heard about school lag? Probably not because I just came up with it.

School lag: period of time that comes directly after finishing a semester or course at an education center, (at whatever level) characterized by impending lazyness, sleeping in, occasional yawning and nearly permanent apathy. The suspected cause of these symptoms is to be mentally, and in more complicated cases, physically burnt out. The cure requires about two to five days (not just nights) of resting and sleeping.

See? School lag.

That is my present state, except that I still have to go to college to find our my grades for one more week, a beautiful babe to look after, and a home to keep when I am at home. Thus, my rehab isn’t exactly expedient rather than being drawn out.

Ha ha... Want something a bit more graphic? The breakfast dishes are still waiting to be washed, the house is a mess, I’ve got two little mountains of (folded, mind you) clothes needing ironing, the bed hasn’t been made yet (Belle Fille is still sleeping there) and I could continue this list but you get the idea.

Me? My hair is disheveled, I’m wearing a robe with little hearts on it and slippers and was reading in bed in middle of all this, until I realized that I’d better take advantage of my baby sleeping and blog. I’d sleep myself, but it wouldn’t be very restful because the idea of all the stuff I have to do would be nagging at the back of my mind the whole time. However, I don’t really feel like doing anything this very instant, so here I am. Thankfully, it’s like 10:30 or something so I don’t feel pressured just yet.

I made french toast today and stayed at the table reading this article while Belle Fille walked around her high chair in the kitchen. Then she suddenly stopped, turned around, came straight to me, and but her head on my lap.

Hey baby cakes, are you still hungry?

No.

Are you sleepy?

No.

I pick her up and hug her, and she snuggles up to me.

Do you love me?

No.

Do you want more strawberry milk?

No.

I sing to her, and rock her slightly. Kiss her head and ask

Did you know I love you?

She doesn’t answer. Instead, she seems to think about it for a few seconds, smiles and nods. She never spoke, but she told me

Yes.

Yay! I'm freeeee...!

Finally! FINALLY! I don't have to worry about school anymore, today I finished my last exam. I'll have to come to college for a other more week, but just to check out my grades and, be them as they may, for better or for worse, I can't do a single thing about them. I did what had to be done, and I can do so no more. Bliss!

I feel like it's been eons since I last had free time and was able to come here and tip some of my thoughts into the bloggy world. My head is so full, I think it would've been better to come here for a quick vent/refresh, but that sort of time was a luxury I couldn't afford. But here I am now. And it feels great!

Can you tell how incredibly relieved I feel? Ok I admit I'm very tired: my eyes burn from lack of sleep and I'm short of enthusiastic, not at all how I seem on print right now. But don't be mistaken. I am jumping up and down right now. Inside. My joy is an internal one, one of hope and peace.

No homework! No essays! No freakin' exams! And on the other hand, this is translated directly into more sleep, more time with my baby and my babe (coff coff, my hubby), more time to blog, to sleep,to read for leisure, to visit friends and family, to sleep... you get the picture.

As a matter of fact, I'm going to visit my grammy today and so'll my big bro so I'll get to see him too. I just love coming over to visit my old nest. It's so warm and cozy and comfy... I don't have to make any kind of effort at all to keep up a facade. And especially, since my gram and family over there don't see Belle Fille nor me on a regular basis, when we can come over it's like a longed for reunion.

There's no schedual, no program... if I want to sleep, I can do so without worry because I know Belle Fille is being oooed and fawned over at by at least two people. If I'm hungry there's good food available, and even the chance of going out for taquitos. If I want or need a friendly ear, there are several well disposed.

No one is ever in a terrible hurry, no one ever EVER gives off offense, no one yells... You know what, let me give you a tour of my grams' home while I'm at it. It's so nice, I feel peace already just thinking about it.

From the outside, it looks like a wee little house, and when you come in and take a quick glance you realize it really is a small house. But when you look again the dinner table is big and if you squeeze together you can fit at least eight people comfortably. The living room is cozy and perfect for talking because there are no distractions like TV or stereo (those are upstairs) and there's a big window that takes up most of the wall so you don't feel cornered because you can see everything outside and it let's in large amounts of natural light to acentuate the pleasant tone of your conversation.

There's a single picture on the wall in the living room, impressionist, but moderate and completely intelligible. I think it's called "European Walk", and it's a single lane, or walk, lined on the left side by a couple of spaced vases with red and white, blowsy kind of flowers. The vases are on a thick, stone rail and beyond that, more to the left is a small pond with lilys and an old building in the back. To the right of the portrait is a garden, warm and green and inviting, with sunshine spilling out of the upmost leaves.

It's a little messy, a little wild, with leaves on the floor and swirling in the air. And a little lonely, a little secluded you know? If you ever needed time to yourself, or felt sad, or happy, or needed to be inspired, or reflect on a problem, or wanted to walk with that speacial someone, you would choose this walk. You can easily imagine Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy walking along here. And the lane goes on and on infinitely until the garden becomes a green blur and you can barely make out the vases with flowers but you know they're there, just out of your sight.

Hmmm... you know what, I can't do justice to my grams house without writting a lot more, but I don't have too much time on my hands, so I'm afraid I'll have to continue this post another time. It is well worth it.

Well, bye bye for now, and thanks for reading. I'll be back. Soon. And you know why? 'Cuz I'm on vacation!

Whoopee!!! ;)

PS: The pic that comes with this post is named Ophelia and the author is Arthur Hughes. It has nothing to do with my grammys' picture besides it being a picture as well. But I love it!